**Warning--this may be the single longest post I have ever written on my blog. You are under no obligation to read it. This is for me, my children, and my family. Some stories just deserve to be told.**
In the summer of 2000 I was working for the LDS Foundation Telefund as a telefunder. Basically, we called BYU alumni and asked for donations. We had a script that we would read from that began, "Hi. My name is Angie Hickman and I'm a student at BYU from Manassas, Virginia." Every phone call began the same but they always ended differently. One of the only phone calls that I remember completely changed my life. It sounds cliche and a tad silly, but it did. The person that I had called (ok, really the computer had dialed their number for me) stopped me after the very first sentence. He told me that he was a professor on campus and was not interested in donating. However, he was very interested in my last name. He said that his wife's maiden name was Hickman. He gave me his office number and told me to stop by sometime so we could compare family histories. Well, that would have been great except I did not know much about my family history. After my shift that day I drove right to Deseret Book and picked up a beginning family history packet. I called my parents and requested copies of all of the information they had. I was not about to show up to a professor's office unprepared. However, in the process of preparing to meet this professor I ended up getting hooked. I signed up for a family history class that fall.
After my into to family history class in the fall, I decided to pursue a minor in family history. (I needed to be "working towards something" to remain NCAA eligible for my 5th year at BYU and I had already pretty much finished up all of my classes for my degree). All of the family history classes at BYU required that we choose one family in our family line to research for the semester. The teacher would show us research methods, and then we would be sent out on our own to do the research on our family. I wanted to use my time wisely, so I would often say a prayer before choosing a family. For one particular class I felt strongly that I needed to research the Gerber family. Rosa Ellen Gerber was my 2nd great grandmother on my father's mother's side. For some reason I felt strongly that there was something I needed to do for this family. I was sure it involved taking their names to the temple. Unfortunately, within the first week of the semester I discovered that all of their temple work had been done. I truly didn't understand why I had felt so strongly about this particular family and I was seriously disappointed. It seemed that my semester was going to be wasted researching a family that didn't the help. I knew I had many other lines that most certainly needed their temple ordinances. But the decision had already been made and I didn't want to approach my professor about a change so I plugged on. (It should also be noted that the one story that my grandmother has shared about her grandmother presents a less than pleasant picture of Rosa. In my mind, Rosa is such a pretty name and yet what she did was such an ugly thing. And yet, I was and am still drawn to her family.)
Sometime within that first month of the semester I learned my true purpose. In the 1900 census the women were asked two incredibly important questions. The first is, "How many children did you give birth to?" and the second is, "How many are living?" My jaw hit the table when Rosa's mother, Rosina, stated that she had given birth to 13 children. Temple work had been done for 8 children, not 13. Who and where were the other 5? That's a whole lot of children to just miss!
A detailed analysis of all of the census reports throughout Rosina's life quickly unveiled the names of 2 of the mystery children--Milo and Moses. From the census you can deduce an approximate birth year and you are generally given a birth state, but nothing else. I'm not one to turn in incomplete work or to just stop there. I wanted dates. Solid real birth dates, death dates, and places. I wanted to know who these kids were and why no one seemed to remember them. I wanted them to be sealed together to the rest of their family. I was on a mission.
My assignments exposed me to many avenues of family history research. One of the research methods involved searching
WorldCat, the largest library card catalog. Our professor had us search for anything relevant to our families--surname, state histories, county histories, and so forth. I was not expecting to find anything really when all of a sudden a search result came up--
The Personal Memoirs of Mrs. C. Gerber. No way....did I really get that lucky? Did she write an autobiography and actually have it published? Was it really in a library in Minnesota? Why Minnesota? Well, there was only one copy and only one way to find out. I requested an inter-library loan, and then was promptly denied. The library only had one copy, it was old and in bad condition. They offered to send me a photocopy instead. Deal!
It did not take long for my photocopy of the book to arrive and I was not disappointed. It was my 3rd great-grandmother's autobiography. It came complete with pictures of the family farm and all of her adult children. It even included pictures of her and her husband at earlier ages. I was thrilled!
It was at this point that I decided to call my grandmother and report on the amazing information that I was finding. I had checked with her at the beginning of the semester requesting information and she had told me that she didn't know anything and to let her know what I found. So, I called. Upon my revelation of the book she remarked something to the effect of, "Oh yes. I have that book in my garage." She had just let the air out of my sails. My grandmother had this book the whole time. (I will now happily report that through a series of transactions the book is now at my house. It is nearly 100 years old and not in the greatest shape, but it's here and it's one of my treasures.) This book provides a great deal of information on the family, but what is most notable about the book is the information that it doesn't provide. For example, Rosina mentions that her mother was born in 1801, married her father at the age of 22, and came to America with 3 small sons. No where does she ever mention her mother's name! Arggghh! The other very obvious omission is the very information I was seeking--the missing 5 children. The 8 children that had already had work done at the temple are the 8 children mentioned in the book. (This also tells me that whoever submitted the temple work must also have a copy of the book. The 8th child was an infant at death and never mentioned in a census. The only mention of that child is in the book.) What I still do not understand is why Rosina mentioned losing baby Elizabeth at 11 months old, but never mentioned 5 other children.
The semester was winding down and I still had very little to show for my efforts. My final research report was due on a Monday and so I returned to the BYU family history library that Saturday morning with nothing but determination and a tiny bit of hope for a miracle. I had been on the computers at the library for about a half an hour when a miracle occurred. I had performed a search on familysearch.org that I know I must have done several times before, but this time I got a different result. This time staring back at me from the screen was a listing for the Gerber Family Cemetery located in Hickory County, Missouri. The same county as my Gerbers. The microfilm of the cemetery records were only available in Salt Lake, however.
After only a minute's hesitation I went to a campus phone and called a friend from my family history class. I briefly explained that I had to see what was on this microfilm in Salt Lake and asked if she'd like to come along. She was still working on her assignment, too, so she agreed. Within another half hour my car was gassed up and on the road. I remember walking right into the library with the call number in my hand already. I didn't even stop as I practically ran up the stairs and into the shelves to pull the microfilm. My friend stayed behind on the first floor to dig through books. I found myself a reader and sat down to start turning, and turning, and turning. The records were the last thing on the reel, but there they were. The Gerber Family Cemetery was in fact the family cemetery located on the family farm of Mr. Christian Gerber, my 3rd Great-grandfather. The first five entries in the cemetery records were those of the five missing children, complete with names, birth and death dates. I seriously wanted to shout with excitement--but I was at the library.
After turning in my research report (I received an A, by the way) I readied the names for the temple. In the summer of 2002 (after being endowed and set apart as a missionary), I was able to attend the Jordan River temple with my father and stand in as proxy for the sealing of these children. What a wonderful event and what a wonderful story!
I've shared this story a few times over the last 10 years or so. Honestly, I thought the story was over. I have always felt, and continue to feel, a strong bond with the Gerber family. Whenever I think of family history, they are the first family that I think of. And I always thought it was because of my experience as a young student at BYU. I never thought there would be more to the story.
In November of 2009, Reid and I were sitting in a small conference room in Denver Children's Hospital and being told that our son had a life-threatening genetic illness. We were told that we were carriers of this disease. One of the reactions that I had (and I feel might be somewhat normal) is to try to figure out where this disease came from. There are so many questions that go through your mind at a time like that but they are all summed up by the basic questions. What? Why? How? When? The reality is that there really aren't very many answers to any of those questions. They can't tell you what will happen to your baby--each case is unique. They can't tell you when it's going to happen either, if it's going to happen at all. The why is the only thing they attempt to answer with genetics. They also tell you that it's not your fault and that you didn't do anything wrong. But it still doesn't ease the desire to find something or someone to blame. And in all of this discussion of genetics, my mind went back to the Gerbers. They had lost five children under the age of 2. Could CF have been to blame? No one can tell you that, as CF wasn't actually identified as a disease until the late 1940s. In other words, before that children with CF were labeled as children who just didn't grow. They didn't thrive and they would either die of malnutrition or a lung disease. But no one knew why.
Learning to accept a diagnosis like CF is not easy, and takes time. At first I would search for information and then I would become so disheartened and discouraged by the news that I would vow never to venture onto those sites again. I just wasn't ready. In the last couple of months, that has changed, though. I don't know what has changed or if the passage of time has eased the pain, but I do know that I'm ready to get more information. My baby needs me to fight for him and to do that I need to have information.
At one of our earlier clinic visits, the doctor provided us with the names of Finn's mutations (the genes that cause his CF). The first is Delta F508 (dF509) and the second is 3905 insert T. The first mutation is the most common CF mutation in the world. Nearly 80% of people with CF have at least one copy of that mutation. His second mutation is much less common. In fact, there's not that much information out there on that mutation. The day we were told about his second mutation, Reid hit the Internet and found one study about the mutation. The information provided was not positive at all. I called our doctor and she reassured me that that particular study was a bit dated and involved a rather small sample size. The reassurance helped a bit.
Within the past 2 weeks, I have joined a CF Mama's facebook group where I have learned a fair amount of invaluable information. After reading a comment on the page I decided to search for the study about 3905 insert T myself. I wanted to see the information first hand. (
Here's a link to the study.) The study's information on morbidity and mortality was interesting and I took a while to absorb it. However, it was the very last paragraphs of the study that made my jaw drop.
At present, the 3905insT mutation is the second most common mutation in Switzerland. Its incidence among the Swiss CF population is 4.8%, and 16.9% in the ethnically Swiss originated Amish population in America.
Rosina Gerber, my 3rd great-grandmother, starts her book by mentioning that her father, Abraham Mosser, was born in Switzerland. Oh, and by the way, did I mention that the entire Mosser/Gerber family line is Mennonite--the precusor to American Amish? Do I look Amish to you??
I know that without blood tests everything is just a theory, but I sure do have a lot to back this theory up. My son has a genetic mutation that has the highest incidence rate among the "Swiss orginiated Amish population in America". My 3rd great grandmother is Swiss Amish-Mennonite (some of our family referred to themselves as Mennonite while others called themselves Amish-Mennonites) who also happened to lose 5 children before the age of 2. One of the daughter's cause of death was described as pneumonia--a lung infection that often occurs with CF. I will admit that they lived on the prarie in the 1800's where medical care was not readily available and it was not uncommon to lose children at a young age. I do understand that. But maybe there was more to it than that. Maybe the reason that I have always felt a strong connection to the Gerber's has a lot more to do with genetics than I would have ever imagined. I can tell you this, though--I can't wait to meet Rosina Gerber in person and give her one big hug. I'm looking forward to that day.
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| Christian Gerber and Rosina (Mosser) Gerber |
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| The 7 Gerber children that lived into adulthood. My 2nd Great grandmother is the very top picture. |
The 5 "Missing" Gerber Children
Moses Gerber-- b. 10 Jan 1868 d. 23 Oct 1886
Milo Gerber--b. 22 Jul 1869 d. 9 Aug 1870
Amanda Gerber--b. 20 Jan 1871 d. 9 Oct 1871
Joseph Gerber--b. 29 Jun 1872 d. 22 Jul 1872
Thomas Gerber--b. 28 Aug 1877 d. 28 Jun 1878
